Who are all these sixtysomethings? Your guess is as good as mine

This past Saturday was my high school class 45th reunion, an informal affair held in a park back home with a picnic.  My friend Diana is the one who organized it, and I cannot tell you how heartbroken I am that I couldn’t be there.  I’m still struggling with long covid, and unable to be outside for more than a few minutes, let alone be around more than one person without my central nervous system going haywire. 

(I’m improving but know my limitations.  Still, it would’ve been nice to see this crew in person, especially after losing 50 pounds this past year.  What a waste of my trim bod!)

To be very honest, when Diana sent me this photo I probably recognized less than five people.  We didn’t have a big class to begin with (I think the Jefferson Morgan Class of ‘79 was around 109 students) but of the classmates I was close to, none were here.

Still, I feel a real kinship with this group and may never see them again.  :^(

I don’t know why, but I was never big on class reunions in the first place.  I didn’t attend our 5th in 1984, because I was a college dropout and embarrassed to be working in the Garden Shop of our local Murphy’s Mart. 

By the time our 10th one rolled around in 1989, I had gone back to school, got a great IT job in the city, had a closet full of suits… but was anxious to focus on my future and leave the past behind.  Dumb.

I was ready to attend our 40th in 2019, but there simply wasn’t enough interest and it was canceled.  Diana wanted to do a “Happy 60th Birthday Party” a year later (as most of us were turning 60) but the covid pandemic nipped that event.  

Well, we have a 50th coming up in 5 more years.  Diana says I’ll be attending that one for sure, we’ll see.  Fingers crossed!

PS.  Back in 2017, when I met up with my former classmate Karen for the first time since high school (I wrote about her here) we talked about our class and how neither of us ever went to a reunion.  We made a promise to attend the next one together, which of course didn’t happen. 

Karen succumbed to the rapid onset dementia she was diagnosed with last summer, and passed on August 25, 2024.   Rest in peace, Karen.

 

 

I am not the person in this photo—I miss the guy, but hope I never see him again

This is me, one year ago, September 2023.  I was with my friend & former classmate Diana on one of our late summer road trips.  We were on our way to tour Frank Lloyd Wright’s Fallingwater house, but stopped at “Lucky’s Casino” to check things out.

That night when I got home and Diana sent me the photos she’d taken, I almost had a meltdown when I saw this one.  How did I get so fat?  How?  I weighed myself, 270 1/2 pounds.  I made a vow to exercise more and lose 20 pounds by Christmas.

Three months later, the week before Thanksgiving, I had my annual check-up with my PCP.  When I stepped on his scales, they said 272.6.  I was aghast.  Dr.Ahmed said “I sure wish you’d try to lose 20 pounds in the next 6 months.  You’d feel SO MUCH better.”

Two weeks later I got covid.  And two weeks after that I got long covid.  And here we are, now in it’s 9th month, and I’m getting hopeful signs everyday, but it’s been a very slow recovery.  One of my doctors said “From what we’ve learned about this condition, short of cancer it’s probably the worst thing a person will go through.”   I believe that 100%.

At the start of the year, I began weighing myself every 4-5 days (just to have something to do while living in misery).  Other than giving up ice cream, I pretty much eat the same foods and haven’t done a lick of exercise.  And yet, I still managed to lose 45 pounds.  With a little luck I’ll hit 50.

• Jan 04  -  270.5    Feb 05 -  266.6    Feb 20 -  262.5    Mar 04 -  259.1
• Mar 12 -  255.2    Mar 19 -  252.0    Mar 21 -  249.0    Mar 30 -  250.2
• Apri 03 - 249.0    Apr 10 -   250.2    Apr 12 -  249.8    Apr 16 -  247.0
• Apr 20 -  246.8    Apr 23 -  246.4     Apr 28 -  246.8    May 3 -   245.8
• May 08 - 244.4    May 15 - 244.6     May 30 - 246.8     Jun 03 -  245.6
• Jun 06 -  243.4    Jun 09 -  242.6     Jun 14 -  241.4     Jun 18 -  240.4
• Jun 22 -  240.0    Jun 26 -  238.0     Jun 30 -  237.8     Jul 04 -   236.8
• Jul 09 -   238.4    Jul 15 -   237.2     Jul 20 -  236.8      Jul 24 -  236.0
• Jul 27 -  234.8     Aug 01 - 233.8     Aug 05 - 233.0      Aug 10 - 231.6
• Aug 14 - 230.5    Aug 27 - 231.2     Sep 03 - 230.4      Sep 08 - 228.8
• Sep 13 - 226.6    Sep 18 - 225.6

I was trying to prove my weight loss with a selfie, but not having a lot of luck.  Trust me, this t-shirt used to be skin-tight a year ago, now it’s baggy

Anyway, I’m hoping to be 85% recovered (or more) by the end of the year.  I’d love to visit the senior center again at least once before 2025, I’ve only been outside 4 times since June.  Anything longer than 10 minutes causes me to shake and sweat profusely for an hour or so.  Still dealing with chronic fatigue (that’s a real thing) and godawful bouts of burning pain in my hands, face and behind but they’re not constant like before. 

Still smelling that creepy odor of diesel fuel and burned sugar off & on throughout the day though.  I swear I think my brain is frying.

Well, I know this must’ve been a real drag to read but just wanted to put SOMETHING new on here.  I also wanted to thank everyone who took the time to leave those very nice comments on my last post.  I hope you know I don’t take any of those for granted.

Take care, everyone.  Talk to you again soon.

 

There’s a light at the end of this long covid tunnel

While the world around me has been abuzz with Ukraine, Kamala, Tim Walz and Donald what’s-his-name, I’ve spent most of 2024 feeling detached from everything.  (I didn’t even know about Joe Biden dropping out of the presidential race until my friend Diana told me—and she avoids the news and is the last to know anything!)

It feels like I’ve been hunkered down in a long, dark tunnel but I’m finally seeing some light at the end.  It’s been a week since the tremors in my right side ended, and the rotten tension headache I’ve had constant for 8 months quieted down greatly 4 days ago.   

I’ve still got a ways to go.  Every muscle in my body aches, making it painful to walk; I move slower than a 200 year old sea turtle on land.  My face still hurts with pin-pricks of pain (like I slept face down in a rose bush) and just going downstairs to get my mail or getting in & out of the shower zaps me of all my energy.  I need to lay down after doing both.  I’m already sleeping 11-12 hours a day as it is.

But I know things are headed in the right direction—I’m finally able to wear my eyeglasses again too.  For the longest time, just having them on my face caused too much pain.  I’m sorry I wasn’t able to keep up with others blogs or with online friends.  This is the first time I’ve been on my laptop for more than a couple minutes in weeks.

Back around mid-July, I developed strong burning sensations in both my hands and in my face and mouth.  I contacted UPMC (my insurance provider) and they said I probably needed to see a neurologist.  Then they informed me one wouldn’t be available until late October to mid-November.

A week later, I downloaded the e-book “Final Exit” from the Internet Archives, on the various methods people have used to end their lives.  It was a frightful read but I was getting close to throwing in the towel.

I contacted UPMC again and told them that.  They arranged for me to meet a neurologist in two days time via Tele-Health, who put me on a six month prescription of 25-50mg Nortriptyline and recommended I begin taking 1000mg of N-acetylcystine (NAC) for inflammation as well, Vitamin D3 tablets daily and to avoid any exposure to sunlight.

She told me it could take 2-4 weeks for the Nortriptyline to take effect, and said it doesn’t help everyone, but several days after taking it I DID notice that drop in my orofacial pain so who knows. 

My face looks like I was in a car wreck—my mouth droops on the left, my eyes are sunken in and I’ve got heavy lines running down both sides of my face.  There’s even an online forum for ‘Covid Long Haulers’ with one discussion titled “Will I get my old face back?”   People who have fully recovered say yes, but it could take a year or more. 

Are you familiar with that quote “what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger”?  I’m sorry, but I think that’s a load of horseshit.  The other night I was looking at my blog from this time last year, at all the outings and road trips and visits with family & friends.  How did I manage to do so much?  I can’t imagine being that active or social today. 

Believe it or not, there has been a silver lining here.  Since January, I’ve lost 44.6 pounds.  No diet or exercise, just 9 months of being a nervous wreck.  I hope I can manage to keep most of it off.

Well, that’s all I have for now.  I wanted to thank everyone again for thinking of me and all your kind words.  I was going to wait until I was fully recovered before writing again but missed my blog.  Thanks for reading and talk to you soon.