I think I’m going to sit right down and write myself a letter—a real one!

 

A couple weeks ago, after posting one of my so-called retirement plan blogs, my sister Shawn wrote me and said “Aren’t you worried about putting your net worth on the internet?!”  I pointed out that I actually hadn’t, I was sharing what I HOPED to have (some years down the road, if I played my cards right).  Still, she had a point… I was letting the world know I had a few bucks socked away.  But surely on this little blog of mine, tucked away in a corner of the internet, no one’s going to really notice those numbers—right? 

Well maybe someone did—because in the last couple weeks, I’ve received not one, not two but three love letters to the email account linked to my blog.  Coincidence?  C’mon! 

 

-----Original Message-----
From: Blogger Contact Form
Sent: Sunday, September 08, 2013 7:23 PM
Subject: [ApacheDug's Teepee] New message received.

 

Hi single man!  I write a "single" because such am I. I am looking for a man like Apache for serious relationships.  At once I ask you to write to me but not if you're married, I don?t like to break any family.

I am Julia. It is not easy to start a conversation but here it goes. I am woman, who still believes in true love. Yes, unfortunately I am very lonely now, and I need a partner. Maybe I need a man to spend time with him, to talk, kiss, make love. This is what I have not and need now. For this reason I decided to write you. If you also wish the same and you're looking for a woman, beautiful, kind and sympathetic, you can send me.   Julia.

 

-----Original Message-----
From: Blogger Contact Form
Sent: Saturday, September 02, 2013 6:43 AM
Subject: [ApacheDug's Teepee] New message received.

Hi. How are you? How are you? I hope all is ok! My name is Galina. My girlfriend shows me your journal and we share laughter over your plight with the Russian women \t is fine! \'m from Russia too. I am 34 years old. \'m a shy girl my friends will tell you. But I open up a little more as I get to know someone. I attache my foto. I hope you like it.

I do not know what to write, because I never used the Internet for American
acquaintance before. Write to me if you want to learn more about another
Galina. I will wait your letter. Take care! Galina 

 

-----Original Message-----
From: Blogger Contact Form
Sent: Saturday, August 31, 2013 4:20 PM
Subject: [ApacheDug's Teepee] New message received.

How is your summer Apache> I think I know.  SMILE!  Hi!  I read your words with real nterest and hey! I am Tara. Borned and live in Italy.  Married once but divorced and never remarry.  Birthday is 14 June 1968 and would like to know, if you are linked to someone or would like new pen pal? You are funny, wise, a straight shooter!  Write me if you are not interest or interest, and let me know this?  Hope to hear from you very soon. Tara

.          .          .

Tara didn’t provide a photo (c’mon Tara!) but it’s precisely because she didn’t that I’d even consider her letter being legitimate.  Those other pics look like they were lifted straight from some Russian dating site.  In any case, it doesn’t matter—I’m not interested, phony ladies!

Now if you REALLY wanted to reel me in, I’d try something a little less obvious.  For starters, someone closer to my age—and who doesn’t live two continents away!  I’m partial to bookwormy brunettes, I’m a real sucker for girls who wear glasses and frankly the more neurotic, the better. 

Darn it, I know you’re out there!