An old woman, an OCD woman & an odd woman: it’s curtains for Apachedug

Around noon Saturday after cleaning my apartment, I had some leftover pasta for lunch then went down to the lobby to see if the mail had arrived. 

I was pleased to see my 4th floor neighbor and friend Opal sitting outside in her folding chair on the front landing.  She had her mug of tea in one hand and a giant word-puzzle book in her lap.  I opened the door and murmured hello, she looked up and said hello back and asked if I was coming out.  I said yes for a couple minutes, let me grab a chair.  Opal went back to her giant puzzle book. 

I asked “New puzzle book?”  and without looking up she said “Yep.”  I asked what the deadline was on completing it, she said November. 

(Opal says if she didn’t give herself deadlines, nothing would ever get done.  Opal has some OCD issues.)  There was a highback chair beside hers, white cane with green satin cushions.  I asked “What’s this?” and tapped one of the chair’s legs with my foot.  Without looking up, Opal said “What do you think it is?”  I said “Well… it looks like a chair from the Ladies Tea Room on the Titanic.”   Opal looked up at me and laughed.  “Haha! Be nice, it belongs to Flora.  She was out here having tea with me earlier.”

I asked “How old do you suppose she is?”  Opal said “Oh, late 80s… 90.”  I said “Did she ever tell you how she and her sister used to ride their horse Listerine and gather wildflowers and look for wood faeries or something?  Then the Spanish Flu came along and ended all that.”  Opal said “She’s old alright!” 

I said “But if you do the math… the Spanish Flu was 1918.  And she’s running around before then?  That would make her like… 110?  115?  We’re being conned!”  Opal gestured at the glass behind me, and I turned to see Flora tap-tap-tapping on the pane.  I got up and opened the door for her, and Opal asked her if she was coming back outside.  She said no, she was going to lie down for awhile.  Opal said “Flora, Douglas here was telling me about your horse Listerine!  Is that true?” 

Flora lowered her head and shook it back and forth and cleared her throat.  She said “ I think Douglas is having some fun with you, sweetheart.”  Opal said “Oh really!”  Flora said “My horse’s name was Libertine.”

After Flora went back inside and I set her Titanic chair in the lobby, Opal asked what else was new.  I said “Well… I hung some new curtains in my bedroom last night.  New to me that is.  I bought ‘em 4 years ago from Wayfair but forgot I had them.  I found them in the back of my closet after I hurt myself and was looking for a first-aid kit.”

Opal said “How’d you hurt yourself?”  I said “Oh it was little.  Around 11pm I was hungry, so I thought I’d boil an egg.  After it was cooked, I tried to carry the egg from the stove to my sink with a spoon, and dropped it on my big toe.” 

Opal said “Ouch!  Did you find your first-aid kit?”  I said no, but after I found those curtains, I wasted no time washing that giant window and it’s large dusty blind.  And in the windowsill was a small aloe vera succulent, and I remembered my friend Kay’s mom using a piece of aloe vera plant on a burn, so I tried that and some ice and it helped.

Opal said “Who’s Kay?  Does she live here?”  I said “No, she lives in Hawaii.”  She said “How do you know someone who lives in Hawaii?”  I said “Um… thru the internet.”  She said “Why do I get the feeling you’re hiding something?” 

Ulp!  I didn’t want to tell Opal about Kay’s blog or mine, she has no idea I have one and I want to keep it that way.  If she saw how many times her name’s been mentioned here… I said “You’re silly, why are you so paranoid?”  Opal said “I know!  My daughter tells me the same thing!” 

We talked about her daughter’s recent move to Ohio and some other things, when Opal said “Look who’s coming” and motioned to the sidewalk in front of our building.  I looked out and saw a smaller woman headed in our direction.  I’ve seen her from a distance once or twice before, and truth be told, liked what I saw. 

She looked about sixty, give or take a year and had a pretty nice figure.  Her hair was white and clipped short, and she sported lavender framed glasses.  I said “Ah.  I’ve seen her before.  Didn’t she move into that unit down the hall from yours?  411?  When was that, a week ago?” 

Opal said “It was two weeks ago and it’s 410.  And let me tell you, she is one odd lady!  You should live on my side of the floor, she was doing her wash the other day and was singing in there!”

I said “What’s wrong with that?  I sing in the shower all the time.  I do John Denver, Eric Burdon, Bob Dylan—“   Opal stopped me.  “She SINGS.  High falsetto.  Not an entire opera, but it was pretty loud!”

Hmm.  I didn’t say anything, just watched as she got closer to the building.  I saw two plastic grocery bags hanging from her one hand, one bag from the other. 

Opal said “Well, I’m going to take my stuff upstairs and get something to eat.  Are you coming?”   I said “You go ahead, I think I’m going to wait on our new neighbor and get the door for her.”  Opal rolled her eyes and headed inside.

When our new neighbor got closer to the entrance, I said “Hi, how are you?”  She said “Fine…”  I said “My name’s Doug, I live on the fourth floor.  My friend Opal said you’re the new tenant in 410?  I—I just thought I’d say hi and get the door for you.”  

She tilted her head slightly and said “Well thank you.”  I offered to take her bags and she handed me one.  She said “My name is Meira.  My family and friends call me Mishie.”

Wha?  I said “Well, it’s nice to meet you… Meersha—Meerie.  Meira.”

As we walked thru the inner lobby doors and turned left towards the elevator (where Opal was still waiting for it to arrive), Meira sort of fell in step behind me.  And then suddenly, without warning—she broke into song.  I swear to God Almighty, I am not making this up.

Ah! Sweet mystery of life
At last I've found thee…
Ah! I know at last the secret of it all…

My head and shoulders jerked so suddenly I think I gave myself whiplash.  Her notes weren’t as high as Jeanette MacDonald, but they were high enough—and pitch perfect.  I looked ahead at Opal, who would not look in our direction.  She just stood there, staring hard at the elevator doors and willing them to open before we got there.

The elevator doors opened just as we approached, and we all stepped inside.  I turned to Meira and said “Bravissimo”.  She tilted her head and said “Thank you, sir.”

I don’t know why, but my face felt hot enough to fry an egg on! 

The three of us rode in silence to the fourth floor.  When the doors opened, Opal looked at me, shook her head and stepped off without saying a word.  I said “Have a nice day Opal” and she waved goodbye without turning around.  Meira got off next and I handed her her bag, and said “It was nice meeting you.”  She said “As it was you.”

I admit it, I’m intrigued.