Thinking out loud: Where do we (and where do I) go from here

A couple days ago, I did something on here I once promised I’d never do again—I deleted my last post.  And then I deleted the one before that.  It was a couple days after Donald Trump won the Presidential election and I was feeling stunned and angry (still am) but also naive, arrogant & despondent.  I just couldn’t stand looking at these posts anymore.

The first is from November 5 with a wink-nod to the ‘obvious’ victor (Hillary); and the second from the night of the election when the writing was on the wall

I confess I’ve been looking at this from two different viewpoints.  I worry what Trump and the GOP have in store for this country, but I’m scared for myself too.  If it hadn’t been for accessibility to affordable health insurance, I never would’ve left my job with UPMC.  (Though at the time, it didn’t feel like a choice.)  There’s a lot of talk about ‘repeal & replace’ of Obamacare, but no one knows what that means.  I don’t care what Trump claims, I have a feeling the repeal will come a lot sooner than the replace. 

I have a feeling there IS no replace.

(And after the year I’ve had with kidney stones & TMJ, with trips to 2 emergency rooms, I just can’t imagine going without.)

Frankly, I’m exhausted with all of it.  I’ve been trying to stay off Facebook, where a couple former classmates are overjoyed and happily rubbing Democrats noses in it; meanwhile, other Trumpeteers are giving long, tiresome speeches on how we should all be thinking and behaving.  Even the Hillary supporters are wearing me down, angrily pointing out over & over how we’re all fudged and “look what Trump is doing NOW”  as if it will make a difference.

I will say I’m trying my best to understand why things happened the way they did.  The more I hear & read of former miners, autoworkers & other blue collar workers not just wanting change but desperate for it, I get why they voted the way they did.  It helps with the anger some (mine, at least).  I just hope they’re not the ones who get punished most for choosing who they did. 

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