Saturday, June 24, 2023

Warden, for my last meal this Democrat would like…

This was today’s Early Bird dinner in the teepee.  A hamburger with Boar’s Head Creamy Horseradish Cheese, dill pickle slices & ketchup, Utz Hawaiian Chips and sliced cucumbers in a homemade dill dressing. 

I also made lemonade and very soon I’ll be having warm apple pie and a scoop of vanilla bean ice cream for dessert.

I’m no great cook, and most would say this isn’t cooking anyway—but right now this is my favorite meal.  I’m like Wimpy in those old Popeye cartoons when it comes to hamburgers.  I can’t get enough of them. 

(Psst--my second favorite burger comes with swiss cheese, sauteed green peppers & mushrooms and lots of A1 Steak Sauce.  Third favorite is no cheese, a buttered bun, Heinz yellow mustard and a big slice of white onion.  Now that’s Hamburger Heaven!)

It got me to thinking, if I lost control and killed someone, and wound up on Death Row and the warden was asking what I’d like for my last meal, it’d be hamburgers without question.  I know, why am I thinking about wardens & death rows? 

Because earlier today I was downstairs in my building’s lobby, patiently waiting for a pricey delivery from Amazon.com, while having to listen to Rover Joe sing the praises of Donald Trump to a couple of glum looking senior ladies.  And me.  It was torture.

Rover Joe, a grizzled senior in his mid eighties, has only talked to me one time.  We were alone downstairs a couple years ago, he was eyeing me up & down.  He finally said “When I was your age I was hopping trains, out there living.”  I replied “But I’m 60.”

Anyway, as he was sitting here blaming the Democrats for all of Trump’s “fake problems” I imagined holding a throw pillow over his nose & mouth.  I know that sounds a bit drastic, but I just heard this same stuff a couple weeks ago from my brother Steve and I swore never again. 

We were at our niece Sophia’s graduation party, and Steve (who was sitting across me) was laughing about the Liberals latest attempt to take down Trump, and how the Donald was smarter then all of them.  Steve could hardly wait until Trump was in the White House again.

I calmly replied it was beyond my mental scope how anyone in their right mind could or even want to defend such a corrupt narcissist so intent on destroying our democracy. 

If it hadn’t been our niece’s graduation party, and that had been someone other than my brother, and my 87 year old Aunt Dena wasn’t sitting beside me… I can’t help thinking we’d be better off with one less Trumper.  It’s not like they can be deprogrammed.

Oh well, I hope Rover Joe’s around long enough to see Donald go to the big house—and I don’t mean the white one.  I hope I live long enough to see it too!

Sliced cucumbers (and onions) in a creamy dill dressing

Blend 3/4 cup Duke’s Mayonnaise, 2 tablespoons white vinegar, 1 tablespoon granulated sugar, 1 teaspoon black pepper, 1 teaspoon garlic powder, 1 teaspoon Dried Dill Weed.

(Don’t use sour cream, it will turn watery overnight—and yogurt is for sissies.  Use Duke’s Mayo, it’s tasty and will stay creamy for a week.)

Pour over 2 sliced cucumbers (or one torpedo like this one) in an airtight container and chill for at least one hour.  Sliced onions are a plus. 

Well, I’m going to wrap this nonsense up, get some dessert and see how much I can watch of Avatar: The Way of Water before I doze off.  (The movie is over 3 hours long!)

Apple pie from Lincoln Bakery… now that’s worth staying out of jail for.  

 

58 comments:

  1. Well, it's not what I would choose for my last meal, but then again we are all different, thank goodness. I try my best to limit the time I might have to spend listening to such people, and I can understand why you might contemplate murder in such a situation. :-)

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    1. DJan, I feel like you really get me haha--thank you my friend! :^)

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  2. When I make hamburgers, I mix in a couple of spoons of Dijon mustard and some soy sauce. This keeps them really moist and tasty. I learnt that from a Chinese TV chef in Boston.
    It also means it really doesn’t need any other condiments, but I do cook some onions to have on it, and I slice some tomatoes and occasionally some dill pickles.
    With that a rather pleasant cabernet sauvignon, preferably one from Coonawarra.

    My cucumber variation is a bit of rice wine vinegar and a teaspoon or two of sugar. Slice the cucumber really thin and marinate for half an hour. It goes with lots of things. Originally it had salt in it as well, but I leave that out.

    You do seem to run into Trump people – talk about bad luck. I have not met a single Trumpist around these parts (not really surprising).
    P.S. I would acquit you if I was on your jury.

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    1. The Dijon and soy get mixed into the mince before cooking, just in case that wasn’t clear.

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    2. No jury would convict you. And that apple pie looks delicious.

      Mary

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    3. Thank you Peter, I JUST BOUGHT a bottle of (low sodium) Kikkoman Soy Sauce a couple days ago, now I'm very anxious to try your burger idea--it sounds excellent. And sad to say, my state (Pennsylvania) is full of Trumpers still. I very much appreciate that acquittal. :^)

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    4. Haha, thank you Mary. Well, I was just venting I swear. :^)

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  3. I quit going to church because I was afraid I might punch people. I am signed up to work at our church festival in two weeks and I am already losing control in my mind. How can they support this piece of crap?

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    1. Miss Merry I think it's awesome that you still want to help at your church...but thanks for my smile this morning, you sure summed it up well!

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  4. We have a family dinner once a week and out of 16 to 18 people there is/was only one trumper. Sadly it's my lovely daughter in law's Dad. When one of his 10year old grandkids told him trump was a terrible person he just walked out and hasn't come back since. This is most of the family he has left - and we don't talk politics or religion at meals at all.

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    1. Celia, I'm sorry he walked out and didn't come back. I do think not talking politics is the smartest thing to do. At least my brother has a sense of humor, when I calmly told him he must be destroyed. He just called me the other night to tell me some family stuff and was just fine! Anyway, thank you for sharing and I hope we can all get past Trump eventually. πŸ™‚

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  5. I've never really thought of what I'd want for a last meal... (probably DH's red beans and rice) but I have thought that if I were on a desert island I would want peanut butter and dark chocolate with me. Your meal does look tasty though... and I would put cheddar cheese on top that apple pie.
    As for those 'Trumpers', it's so hard to understand what they see in him. I can give the benefit of the doubt to most people, but that man sets off all my red flags - it's like emergency warning lights going off in my brain!

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    1. Rian, you are southern through and through! Thanks so much for sharing what your last meal might be and I love the idea of the warning lights in your brain, yes I've been seeing those since Trump came down that escalator in 2015! I never imagined though that things would get to where they are today.

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  6. I asked my old friend the Robot about donald trump and the reply was, “Danger Will Robinson!” He’s the absolute worst thing to ever happen to this country. The damage that him and his supportive republicans have done (and continue to do!) just might be irreversible.

    Jase

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    1. Hi Jase! First of all, I'm jealous of your friendship with the robot. Second, how are you? Third, what you said here is perfectly put. I couldn't agree more!

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  7. Oh, I forgot to mention - did you know that Duke’s Mayo is a regional thing? You won’t find it here out west!

    Jase

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    1. Jase, sorry about that! I just assumed it was a national brand like Hellman's. I actually like dukes a lot more, as it has a vinegar base. πŸ™‚πŸ‘

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    2. I’ve actually tried Dukes (ordered it from Target one time) and it was good but I prefer Best Foods (that’s what Hellman’s is called west of the Rockies). Any mayo is better than that nasty Miracle Whip though!!

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    3. Well, as a lifelong Hellman's fan I hereby approve of it's West of the Rockies equivalent! FYI Jase, I never had Duke's until just 1-2 years ago--as for Miracle Whip I agree!

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  8. The burger looks delicious but I'd have regular cheese as I can't eat horseradish. The apple pie almost had me licking my screen! I wish Trump would just be in jail already. Or dead.

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    1. Thank you River and I sure am sorry you can't eat horseradish. That cheese is a recent find and I'm in love. Speaking of love, I love what you said about Trump! πŸ‘

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  9. I'm not a burger type at all so I would probably choose Super Nachos or something like that. Crunchy but full of a variety of yummy ingredients. It's frustrating and terrifying that there are so many Trump loving idiots around. No matter what he does or says, they still idolize him. Turns my stomach. I feel murderous right along with you, Doug.

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    1. Thanks Margaret! I can't imagine not having burgers in my life, at the same time I've seen what you eat and it's always so delicious. As for these Trumpers, thank you for sharing that. I know you have to deal with a couple in your own life, every time I've read about them on your blog I did feel your pain. I'm just very glad I know people like yourself. πŸ™‚

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  10. Great post Doug! Why is it that Trump fanatics feel perfectly ok spouting their nonsense without a speck of shame! I avoid talking politics unless I know my audience will be a sympathetic one. There is no convincing these hard core right wingers, and it is too stressful to even try!

    Your meal looks delicious! And yes, please keep your criminal tendencies under control 😁; we'd all miss your great posts!

    Carole

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    1. Carole, thanks for making my Sunday morning! So well said on your part, much appreciated. I try to do the same (not talking politics) I really do--but Joe was making me crazy yesterday and this is much more than a difference in opinion. Thanks for the food compliment and haha I will keep my criminal tendencies under reign :^)

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  11. I remember Wimpy in the old Popeye cartoons. Wasn't he the one who always asked for the price of a hamburger for which he'd repay on Tuesday? You certainly know how to amp up the flavour in your meals. That apple pie desert would make me die happy! If Trump becomes president again, Putin will be very happy. ARgghhh!!!

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    1. Haha Florence you have a good memory, that's exactly what wimpy used to say πŸ˜†! As for that pie, I admit it-- I buy either an apple or cherry once a week, they're as good as the ones my grandma baked. As for Trump, if he becomes dictator again I'm going to bake myself into a pie!

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  12. Doug, I love this post! Your meal looks scrumptious. Your cucumber salad recipe is exactly like my grandmothers. I remember asking for the recipe and being surprised that there was sugar in it. I was told that was a crucial ingredient and not to leave it out.
    Oy, you have such restraint to not commit murder listening to Trumpers Doug.
    All the comments here are wonderful. Peter’s hamburger recipe sounds delicious too.
    Did you stay awake for all of Avatar? Chuck wants to watch a 2 1/2 hour movie tonight. I am thinking I probably won’t see the end of it.πŸ˜†
    Enjoy your Sunday Doug.❤️

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    1. Robin you are a dear, thank you for this wonderful feedback and giving me a real chuckle too. Admiring my restraint! Anyway, I agree with you about the other comments, yours included. These really make my day, more than I think people know. Anyway, no I did not stay up for the whole Avatar movie! In fact I only got through 1 hour and 20 minutes, I'll try to watch the rest tonight. What's the movie The Chuck wants to see? You should ask him if you guys can split it in two. πŸ™‚✌️

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    2. It is called “Inglourious Basterds””. No idea what it is like. We totally rearranged the downstairs family room yesterday and found it in a stack of “To be watched” movies. I will let you know how it is.

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    3. I really liked “Inglourious Basterds”, but Norma the A.M. hated it (even though she’s never seen it).

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    4. Haha Peter you made me laugh, rather your musicologist did πŸ˜„. Hey I loved that movie, gave it an A rating on my suspense movies page. I'll be interested to hear what Robin and her husband thinks of it. And Norma should see it!

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    5. By the time it came to watch tv last night it was way too late to watch a movie that long. Glad to read you and Peter enjoyed it. Maybe next weekend.πŸ˜†

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    6. Thanks Robin, don't forget to let us know what you think of it PS. I didn't get around to watching the second half of Avatar either :^)

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  13. Your burgers sound outstanding. I am definitely a burger fan. The cucumber recipe sounds delicious too and I will make this soon. Thank you! In my eyes, Trump is a goner. He is wasting his time and breath, thinking he can even remotely become US President. Maybe he and his followers think pitching him as president will ultimately make it happen. I say, "Dream on."

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    1. Thanks very much Susan, I always enjoy your feedback. I especially liked what you said about Trump, he may be delusional enough to believe he could win, but surely even his supporters know he's a lost cause.. still don't want him running though!

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  14. Funny, I was just telling my caughter that I'm going to cook Hot Italian sausage for dinner tonight because we've been eating hamburgers or hotdogs for much of the past week. I love a good grilled handmade burger, with cheese and ketchup. Dill pickles can be on the side. I just started the cucumber salad this summer - I'd heard about it before but hadn't even tasted it. I did use sour cream, but then again, it only lasted two days before I'd eaten all of it, as I'd used only half of the cucumber.
    Hmmm....last meal request. In my case it would be pizza, either pepperoni bacon, or perhaps chicken ranch.
    We have Trumpers here in Canada too, despite the fact they can't vote for him. They tend to be proponents of the People's Party of Canada, a far right wing group that wants our Prime Minister hung for treason. Some of them are also part of the more mainstream Conservative Party - their current leader likes to pander to them. It terrifies me that he may be our next PM. I try to avoid discussing politics with anyone and thankfully, the few conservative relatives are more moderate.

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    1. Maebeme this is quite a coincidence too, as I was just at the market a couple days ago and bought hot sausage which I haven't had for a very long time. I probably would have had it yesterday if I had the right rolls! I have to say, what you shared here about trumpers in Canada and your own far right wing group both startled and interested me. I didn't have a clue. I need to start paying better attention to politics across the northern border.

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  15. He's your brother. He knows things about you that your parents don't know. And vice versa. So you just agree to disagree and sit in compatible silence.
    My grandmother used to make that dressing for cukes, and for spinach and for all sorts of vegetables. It was soooooo good.

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    1. Thank you Joanne, I did catch my brother before he left and asked him if we were good. We get along pretty well he just called me a couple nights ago to tell me about some DNA Secrets he discovered on Ancestry. πŸ™‚

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  16. Idiocracy is coming closer to becoming reality everyday. You'll have to come sit on the porch and talk politics soon. -Muffin

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    1. Thank you for the invite Muffin! I'm convinced all is not lost πŸ™‚πŸ‘Œ

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  17. *gasp!* YOGURT IS FOR SISSIES???? My dear Doug, I must quibble. Your cucumber sauce is like tzatziki sauce, but without yogurt. I love yogurt, and if you eat it your don't have to take the probiotic pills!

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    1. Hahaha! Damn why is this JUST NOW showing up! Thanks Debby, good advice! :^)

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  18. You know, the Idiot King likes burgers too. I hope if it's your tasty Death Row Last Meal burgers, that Trumpty Dumpty has his before you! Very sick of non-thinking people blabbing about him. Linda in Kansas

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    1. Linda, you sure have a way with words--thanks for the early chuckle 🀭!

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  19. I am not looking forward to the next year in politics. I am surrounded by republicans in my family except for two of my three kids. I had to laugh about you wanting to smother the guy downstairs, funny but not funny I know. I lost a long time friend after she became brainwashed by T-rump. She turned on me, I was willing to just ignore it. And that is a fine looking meal! Joyce in FL

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    1. Thanks very much Joyce, I'm glad my "smothering fantasy" made you laugh (I worried someone would take me seriiously). I sure am sorry about your loss of a long-time friend to Trump too, I lost a couple friends as well and I'll never understand why. At least you were willing to ignore, at the start I didn't, now I do. :^)

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  20. I was all set to comment on your hamburger post as that is one of my favorite subjects. But then you got to Trump...and I know when I'm vastly outnumbered. So I'll just say enjoy the burgers and have a nice day. :)

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  21. Oh dear. I thought I left a comment. Maybe you deleted it. I'll say it again, and if I don't see it, then I will assume that I have offended you with my deep and abiding love of yogurt. Ahem. And so I begin: YOU DON'T LIKE YOGURT ON YOUR CUCUMBERS? Mister, you just literally made tzatziki up there. All that was missing was the YOGURT!!!

    PS: Peter Tibbles??? I want to live where you live.

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    1. Debby, I am SO sorry--of course you didn't offend, but this went to my spam folder and never alerted me it was there! Anyway--you made me laugh here, thank you!

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  22. Do you ever make Black & Blue Burgers? Top a blackened burger with blue cheese (mixed with sour cream or mayo), top with crispy onions. Can also add bacon, lettuce or tomato if desired. There are a ton of variations online but only enjoyable if you like blue cheese. I heard millennials hate it. As for Trump aficionados, they'll never change, they've been indoctrinated. πŸ˜‰

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    1. Bobi, I've never heard of black & blue burgers, but you've got me panting like a dog these sound so good--I can't get enough of blue cheese, and this is going right on top of my Burger Bucket List, so thank you :^) As for our Trumpers, I know, I know. They're a stubborn bunch--but honestly, their leader becomes guiltier with each passing day. I cannot get it.

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  23. Excellent meal, but do stay out of Death Row. Not pleasant dying for a meal like that. As for Trump, he still manages to attract the spotlight wherever he goes. I don't think he'll be reelected, because there are better candidates to consider. I don't like Robert Kennedy, as he is stupid. But Biden is so old, I don't think he should run. We need someone like Gavin Newsom of California, more dynamic and younger. I won't vote for a Republican, because they are pro-guns.

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    1. Thank you Gigi, and you made some excellent points here--I'm in agreement with you on pretty much everything you said!

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  24. In the early 80s when I was 23, I was on a 6-week camping/bus tour of 18-35 year olds from various countries. What I missed most food-wise? A good cheeseburger!! And I'm not a big meat eater. So what did I do instead? Didn't pass up gelato or baked goods. Oye.

    I'm not a Trump fan. However, I live with and among many of them when I'm in rural NW PA; they don't preach because they are the choir. Ha! Many, including the farmers who feed us, still attend church, don't believe we humans are God, and value a sense of right and wrong. And yes, there are lots of guns in NW PA, as hunters are numerous. We aren't killing each other very often though. When I'm in central PA I'm living with a liberal contingent where many think they're the smartest in the room, feel righteous claiming to be atheists, and quickly judge others by their politics before even getting to know the person. Why would that be the case in liberal-land where diversity and acceptance are promoted? We don't see the log in our own eye! Both parties have their carefully crafted scripts, and both make me weary. Time to look into the Forwad party? Thank you for your blog, Dug. I always enjoy your posts. Kim in PA

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    1. Thanks for writing Kim, your comments always make an interesting read. Well, how you described things in NW Pa is pretty much a mirror of SW Pa; and to be honest, my own views have "blurred" a little over the last several years, maybe that's a sign of aging, I don't know... I do know I have several conservative friends who aren't Trump supporters either (and it's probably why we're still friends). Less Donald Trump, more Liz Cheney please :^)

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