Saturday, January 13, 2024

Getting older: you don’t have to look like my grandma (but maybe I do)


A couple nights ago, I was in my customary place on my living room floor talking to my friend and former classmate Diana on the phone, about another friend and former classmate of ours who has fallen on some pretty bad times, health wise.  She may end up in a nursing home later this year.

I remarked that it was simply too incredible to fathom; she’s not even 62 for a couple weeks yet.  (Diana turned 62 this past summer, I did this past Halloween.)

Later, while going through photos on my old computer (yes, I’m taking too much time deciding what I want to move to my new laptop) I came across this picture from May 1976.  It was taken in front of my old high school, and it’s apparently May Day as my sister was a Maypole dancer.  Her dress was red with white stars, in honor of the Bicentennial. 

Grandma Morris, my sister Shawn, Dad in May 1976:  Shawn was 12 here (3 months from turning 13), Dad was 39 & Grandma 62

(Meanwhile, our dad was rockin’ that denim leisure suit!  Seriously, I’d forgotten all about it.  The man was too cool for school.)

As we’d just been discussing the good & bad of being 62, I forwarded this photo to my friend Diana to show her what 62 was looking like in 1976.  Diana gave me a chuckle when she replied:

Boy this made me laugh—I assured Diana that even though my grandmother looked perfect to me, Diana did look less grandmotherly than Grandma here.  I was being honest too.  Diana (who lives on a mostly plant-based diet) is probably in better shape now than she was in the 1970s. 

Anyway, it gave us both a good laugh and I’m glad we ended things on a positive note. But then an hour or so later, I’m in the bathroom brushing my teeth and boy, do I look like my grandma.  That’s not how it’s supposed to work… is it?

Well, on that silly note I just wanted to add a new post to my blog.  I hope everyone out there is doing good.

39 comments:

  1. Truth be told, Dug, in general grandmothers look less grandmotherly these days (IMO anyway). And as for you looking like her, I really can't see her face well enough to tell. But I've always wished that I looked like someone in my family. My cousins think I look like my dad... and maybe I do... but I don't see it. Maybe I'll do a post with some pictures one day and see what the general consensus is. ; )

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    1. Thank you Rian, and yes I'd like to see that! Non-family people are better at seeing resemblances I think. I'll have to post a better one of my grandma.

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  2. One of my great- grandmothers died by the age of 62 and in photos of her before that, she looked 20 years older--probably because of her hairstyle, dress and shoes. OMG, the shoes! I don't think you look like your Grandma, but you do resemble your dad. Glad that you're getting along well or at least OK and great to see a post from you!!

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    1. Thanks for sharing Margaret and you're right--it seems the older the date, the older the people look. Well, thanks for the Dad comment (it means a lot) and for your friendship, it means a lot too. :^)

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  3. Well, I just turned 70 and we will be grandparents for the first time in June. Do I look like a grandfather? Yes, I think so. And I wouldn't want it any other way. On a somewhat related note, my wife and I have been "trying on" different grandparent names that we might want to be called by our grandchild. For me, a few are a definite "no"--Grampy, Gramps, PaPa. And I think it's because those sound really old and crotchety. At first we thought about something cute and trendy (G-Daddy) but then we both decided we think we would rather stick to the traditional. Looking ahead, I don't think I want a teenager calling me G-Daddy! My wife likes Grandmother and I like Graddad or maybe Granddaddy. Grandfather is okay, too, but it does sound a bit stuffy. There's still something to be said for respecting the wiser older ones don't you think?

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    1. Don, haha--thanks for the chuckle here! G-Daddy is funny but--haha! Seriously, congrats my friend and I think Granddad sounds perfect. :^)

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    2. These comments made me laugh...I wanted to be called Grandma, and I am, except when we are in a big crowd and my daughter or granddaughter want to get my attention. They call out, "Red headed mom," or Gramma Red Head." I always know to turn around!

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    3. Hahaha! dkzody, love the names they've given you!

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  4. Hi Doug, great photos! Funny, Chuck and I were having a similar discussion with friends a few days ago. Chuck being 63 and I turned 60 yesterday. Our friends are in their mid 60’s. 60 definitely looks different than it did 50 years ago. I think you look like your Dad. When I look in the mirror I definitely see my Mum.
    Take care.❤️
    Robin

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    1. Robin, thanks but I'm so sorry I missed your birthday, Happy Belated Birthday! 60 is a big one too, my sister Shawn (pictured above) just turned that in August. Anyway, I think you're certainly right that today's sixtysomethings look a lot different than 50 years ago, I wonder why that is. Well, I hope Chuck did something nice for your big day and welcome to the SixtySomething Club :^)

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  5. I think it's wonderful that you have such a great picture of your dad and grandmother. I called my grandfather "grand-daddy" on my mother's side and never knew my other one. I think the only reason you resemble your grandmom is that you both carry some extra weight, and that always adds years, especially in pictures. And welcome back!

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    1. Thanks DJan, but trust me I have her nose too. :^) As for granddads, I knew little of mine as well. But my grandma up there was worth her weight in gold. :^)

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  6. As for the picture of your grandma, sis, and dad...it could almost be an up to date photo, with the way people are dressing now. Your grandmother looks to be about 80 in today's ages and time. I have some friends in their 80s who look very much like her. And your dad looks mid to late 50s in the photo.

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    1. Wow--that's an interesting perspective here dkzody, thanks for sharing. But I do see what you mean, people in past generations DO look older than their years. I wonder if it's just the styles then, or our mindsets now.

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  7. Sometimes I look in the mirror and wonder, “When did dad grow a beard?”
    Then I see a little light globe above the head I’m regarding and realise that he never did and that apparition is me.
    Besides, dad’s 120 years old (well, he would be if only…)

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    1. Music Man, thanks for sharing that thought.. I do the same thing, look in the mirror and nearly don't recognize myself. Wow about your dad being 120... I was just thinking my grandma in the above photo would be 110 today.

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  8. I think you do look like your grandmother and her skin doesn’t look old, it’s the white hair that ages her. I think she looks great. I always thought my grandma looked old, but that was a child’s perspective where everyone looks old. I find myself being more interested in makeup as I’ve gotten older (66). And my husband is 73 and grew a goatee last year and looks pretty cool. So revamp your wardrobe or grow some hair if you want! Have a great weekend! Joyce

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    1. Joyce, that is some great advice thank you. Hmm.. I haven't had a beard since college, but I'm wondering if I could pull off a goatee! :^)

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  9. I like to think I look much younger than my true age. But I will say that I am shocked when I run into former classmates and see how old they look! Perhaps my mirrors are trick mirrors?

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    1. Haha--Miss Merry, you are so not alone in that respect!

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  10. That's a wonderful picture Doug! I love family pictures from the past. Like others have said, I think you look like your Dad. I'm not sure why, but I think people today look younger than their same age counterparts from the past. I'm 72 and I've been a grandma for 28 years. I think I do look like a grandma now but I didn't 28 years ago and my grandma at my current age looked older. (sorry grandma!)
    How are you feeling Doug? I hope that TMJ is a thing of the past now!

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    1. Hi Bonnie, thanks so much for this very nice comment. And wow, you started out as a grandparent very young! As for the TMJ, that's kind of you to ask but I'm afraid it hasn't gotten any better. All I can do is continue with the face stretching exercises and keep my fingers crossed.

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  11. There is nothing at all wrong with looking like your grandma, unless she looks like Sasquatch. I am a mix of both parents, though looking more like my mother as I get older, but still with my dad's chin and my hair is not yet white, though they both were snow white in their 70s. I have several shades of grey and expect to get whiter soon.

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    1. Thanks River, I'm curious what you look like. Do you have any photos online?

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    2. There are a few in some of my Sunday Selections posts (on Sundays obviously) where I'm holding the twin grand daughters, not last Sunday but maybe one or two (three?) Sundays ago.

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    3. I agree with the others here that you don't look 62, your skin looks soft and almost unwrinkled except for the smile lines.

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    4. Thanks River, you're very kind. I need to look at your blog. 🙂

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  12. Regarding Don's comment about becoming a first time granddad at 70; I'm very glad I was a grandma at 41, I got to see the grandkids grow up and now there is a great-grandson.

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    1. That's wonderful River, congratulations. I was going to say 41 sounds awfully young, but my own grandma was only 43 when her first grandchild (my older brother) was born.

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  13. Maybe a little resemblance, Doug. A picture to treasure, for sure. I'm wondering what Shawn was holding. A drink or perhaps a prop for the Mayday dance.

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    1. Thank you Florence, and you have a real eagle eye! My sister was holding a parasol that matched her dress for her Maypole dance :^)

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  14. That is a great photo. No, you and Diana do not show any signs of age 62. No polyester and no denim suits. Doug, let's not forget, you recently rocked a tribal poncho! Now let's talk about who is cool. Shawn is a real cutie in her May day celebration dress.

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    1. Susan thanks so much (and for remembering my tribal poncho)! And you're right, Shawn was very pretty in her May Day getup. :^)

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  15. I see the resemblance to your grandmother in the shape of your face and your nose, but you definitely look like your Dad too. Love the suit he was wearing!
    We never had May Day celebrations but Shawn looks lovely. I'm assuming this was a homemade outfit - someone did a great job of it.
    I'm a grandma, now 64 with a nearly 7 year old grandson. I'd say I look more like your grandmother with gray hair and a lap. :p

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    1. Thank you Maebeme, this was such a sweet read. I DO have my grandma's nose but I could do worse--and yes my dad looked too cool here! As for the dress, I do remember now that it was sewn but I can't remember who did it, I'll have to ask my sister. And I didn't know you were a grandma, I'm sure you love your grandson very much. :^)

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  16. It's not her clothes, but her matronly figure that makes her look grandmotherly. As for you, you aren't wrinkled so you don't look like a grandpa.

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    1. Thanks Gigi.. well, I wouldn't mind looking like a granddad if I was one! :^)

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  17. Old styles just make people look dated. That's it. Avoid the old styles and we'll be hip forever. (This is the lie that I tell myself.)

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  18. I think you are a lucky man, still healthy in old age.

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