Since last Friday (Valentines Day), the left side of my face has been in rough shape. My eye stings pretty constant, and it feels EXACTLY like I was sleeping on my right side under a 1940s sun lamp. The one side of my face feels like it’s gotten a bad sunburn.
It’s my long-covid, doing it’s damndest to stay in the picture. I’m not really here to talk about that though. It just ties into what’s been on my mind this week.
I am very much struggling with things outside my little apartment. Namely, the Trump-Musk Administration’s doings. I hesitate joining the chorus of protests, it raises my already high blood pressure and aggravates this covid-related inflammation.
But more than anything else, I don’t want to alienate the people I know who (for reasons beyond my understanding) are his supporters.
My younger brother. My oldest aunt, who I love very much. A favorite blogger. Someone dear who comments regularly on my own blog. My neighbor (on the floor below me) who pats my hand when she sees me. She has the tiniest, softest hands I’ve ever seen.
One of them said to me that he and another friend (who was not a Trumper) chose to “agree to disagree”. It certainly sounds like the mature thing to do, but I’m finding that to be a problem more & more everyday.
Yesterday I was reading the recent “Hard to take" on my blog-friend Debby’s blog, and one of her commenters wrote that she awakens every day hoping to see Trump’s obituary. But she didn’t say it in a mean or threatening way; she sounded frightened, defeated. Something about it just really connected with me.
I visited this commenter’s own blog—it’s a warm, honest place with fresh baked bread and hand-knitted winter caps. But it also included a rant, and as her blog does include a share button, I think I’d just feel better if I shared that rant below.
This is from Jennifer, of The Sparrow Tree Journal
Rant
Three months ago, on Election Day, I swore I wasn't going to let the second Trump term cause me the daily anxiety and stress that the first did.
Yeah. That's not working out. At all.
I've never been so frightened in my life over politics and the direction of our country. Every day it's just more and more horror. The rule of law, precedents, norms, civilized behavior..............none of it means jack shit anymore.
I find myself resenting Trump voters even more than I used to, and that's saying a lot. I'll have zero, ZERO, sympathy when the lowlife losers and racists who voted us into this mess lose their Social Security, disability payments, workplace protections, FEMA disaster relief, Medicaid, and on and on and on. Fuck every single one of them. We tried and tried to tell people what a disaster this was going to be, and "owning the libs" meant more to them than anything good and worthwhile that America has stood for for the past 250 years. They can all go to hell and rot.
The only thing I regret is that the decent people in this country are going to suffer right along with them. Over the weekend I actually found myself googling "safest blue states for women and minorities" and making a plan for selling the house and moving before things get too bad and we're trapped here. States that border Canada are my first choice.
I can't even believe I just wrote such a thing here on the blog. Never in a million years did I think things would come to this. I love my house, my state, my life, but I won't sit around while our version of the Taliban comes into power and live under the control of such people. We have literal (neo) NAZIS running the show. NAZIS. And a way-too-large portion of our population are ALL FOR IT. It's sickening. Scary. Almost unbearable.
How are you coping? Do you think I'm crazy? Alarmist? If not, are you making plans? I'm afraid this is all going to get much, much worse before it gets better. If you have any words of comfort that might make me think otherwise or feel better, please share them.
And thanks for letting me get this off my chest. As you can probably tell, it's been a bad day.
Thank you Jennifer. I very much appreciate your honesty.
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Hi Doug. Thanks for sharing this. I will NEVER understand folks who support Trump (or should I say President Musk). Every day it is a little scarier. The latest with Ukraine is heart wrenching. A friend of a friend is first generation Ukrainian immigrant...and he supports Trump!
ReplyDeleteI'm getting ready to travel to Paris for a couple of weeks. I'm suddenly feeling like I won't be welcome. Maybe I'll say I'm from Canada!
I limit how much news I read, but am aware of the gist of how things are going. It's all so very depressing, so I avoid the minutiae of the news.
Carole
Carole, thanks so much and for what you shared here. My gosh, how could ANY Ukrainian support Trump?? Anyway, that's wonderful to read about Paris, hope you have a great trip! And yep, I'd fib and say I was Canadian too if I were you. Hope I hear again from you soon.
DeleteI feel the same as Jennifer; much as I don't want to hate/blame those people who voted against our country, Constitution and sane government, I get more and more angry and frightened as safety nets and institutions are decimated. I too have family and friends who thought (and probably still think) this was an excellent idea. My brother and his wife. John's younger daughter and her husband. Several blog readers. A number of Facebook friends. I am heartsick over all of it.
ReplyDeleteThanks for sharing Margaret... my gosh you sound like you know more of his supporters than I do and for that I am TRULY sorry. Well, I'm glad you and I are friends--especially in times like these.
DeleteDoug, thank you for this post. I was wondering if you would have a post about this. I feel just like Jennifer. The day after the election I told a close friend of mine (not a Trumper) that this time I was not going to hold back with telling those "friends" and acquaintances that voted for him that I am holding them directly responsible for the bad, illegal, and damaging things that he does. During his first term I pretty much just kept quiet. No more. This is serious. And ridiculous. I'm angry at those voters AND I'm angry at my fellow Democrats who stayed home and didn't support Vice President Harris. Personally I have greatly cut back on my news consumption but I know that ignoring it is not the right thing to do. There are many efforts that we can (and should) be making to stop this fiasco. I've emailed my senators and my representative. I know they are in the minority and are limited but we MUST continue to let them know we support them and want them to fight rigorously. Here's my take on the "nice" people who still voted for and support Trump: You can't have it both ways. You can't support and elect a convicted felon, traitorous American, unfaithful husband, lecherous father, liar, cheater, mean and uncaring person AND go about your quiet life as if you are a "nice" person. NO. JUST NO. You must accept the responsibility for your actions. And I'm holding them accountable for that. I will never be able to look at them or think of them in the same way.
ReplyDeleteWow--Don, thanks so much for sharing this. You should be the one with a blog, this was a truthful and inspiring read, much appreciated! I couldn't have put this better myself.
Delete“Yikes!”, was my reaction when I opened your column and saw that picture.
ReplyDeleteI’m sorry that Covid is lingering on causing such troubles.
As for the rest of the column, I don’t know anyone who are MAGAs or supporters of the self-proclaimed King.
Of course, I don’t live in your country so it’s not surprising – few in this country would support him (although one or two turn up on TV now and again).
Not just here but none of the Americans I know support him, but (except for you) they live in California, Oregon or New Mexico, not really hotbeds of MAGA support.
Naturally, I support Jennifer’s rant but would go further – my language wouldn’t be suitable for your column.
Thanks Peter, I appreciate your kind words and what else you shared here. Well, most of my state of Pennsylvania (aside from the cities) is pro-Trump. How anyone can look past this man's awfulness, it just escapes me. We are ALL getting screwed for it.
DeleteDug, I'm really sorry that your long covid is still showing up like this. I had hoped you were over the worst of it. Praying this flare-up will go away quickly.
ReplyDeleteAs for the 'rant'... yes, I feel the same as Jennifer. How could good people (family and friends in Louisiana and Texas) vote for this man? And yes, it has divided us. My own son has cut himself off from them. He holds them responsible. I struggle with not doing this as although I can't understand their reasoning, I know they are basically good people who have somehow been taken in. But it's getting harder and harder. I keep hoping that something will register at some point and everyone will sit up and take notice (just hoping it won't be too long coming or too disastrous).
This was very nicely written, as always. Thanks very much Rian. And I think you're right, good people that have been taken in. It's just that we went thru all this before, why in God's name would we choose to again? I hope you're continuing to do well health-wise, and thanks for your own health words.
DeleteI believe we must all come to terms with the fact that America has fallen. The only thing left to do now is focus on survival—and, for those who remain, on rebuilding from the aftermath. And the 'we' is a global 'we' because it will impact everyone on earth.
ReplyDeleteScary and yet well said. Thank you Anon.
DeleteI never believed that I would live to see the end of my beloved country. But I have, and I must believe that somehow there is a silver lining that might not emerge for a long time, but it will, eventually. I pray for that every single day. What else can I do?
ReplyDeleteGosh DJan, it broke my heart hearing you say this. But I know you're wise and I will pray for that silver lining alongside you. Thank you.
DeleteIt gets harder and harder, doesn't it, Doug. I used to be in the agree to disagree camp. In fact two dear friends of over thirty years each severed ties because they could no longer do that and I mourned for months. But suddenly I see their point. They are serious. They are misogynists. They are racists. It's time to take a stand. One view or the other will prevail. I will work for mine. And, their is joy in resistance!
ReplyDeleteThank you Joanne, much much appreciated. I love your words and I hope you keep sharing them, I was planning to share your last blog about the resistance. And my God, I'm so sorry about your former friends.
DeleteAs a Canadian, I was truly saddened when he became President again. I knew things for your country would be in for a rough ride. We have a small number of MAGA supporters in Canada, in my province and our next neighbour, Alberta - in fact there is a meeting to be held at a local club this week to discuss becoming the 51st State. The sane among us are planning a protest outside the club - I'd be there if I were at home. The fact they think that should he have his way, that we'd be a state, and not simply a territory is beyond foolish. While we have pockets of the far right, the majority of Canada is either centrist or left leaning.
ReplyDeleteAs Prime Minister Justin Trudeau posted on social media last night, "You can't take our country....and you can't take our game." He was referencing the win by Canada over the USA at the Four Nations Hockey final in Boston.
It is clear, that between the President and his proxy, Elon, life is going to get more and more difficult for the citizens of the US. Perhaps when, the MAGAt's are impacted directly, they'll discover that those who warned them were correct and the tide may change. Too little, too late, unfortunately for many.
P.S. I hope the long Covid flare-up resolves soon.
DeleteMaebeme this honestly floored me. Unbelievable! But it's fascinating still, thank you for your perspective on this. I sometime follow a Canadian RV'er on YouTube who is a big Trump fan and why, why! Anyway, very much enjoyed your comments here and I cant wait to hear more. And I am glad we know each other. 🙂
DeleteSorry about your long-covid symptoms, Doug. Damn!! Thank you for reposting Jennifer's lament. She expresses, I'm pretty sure, how most of the planet views the Trump reign -- puzzled and profoundly sad that so many support him. My cousin told me that his daughter and son-in-law spent some of this winter in Florida. When some locals saw the Ontario license plates on their car, they were shouted at to "Go home!" My cousins said they will NOT return. So hard to understand the hatred infecting these MAGA minds. Anyway, I sure hope your "Two-Face" phase is soon over with. (P.S. I enjoyed a mug full of your lemon cake yesterday.) ❤️❤️🦉
ReplyDeleteFlorence my lovely friend, thanks so much for chiming in here, but this broke my heart too. We've been allies since the get-go, what the heck Florida?! Gosh how ignorant and pointless. I don't get the hatred either. Thank you for the good covid wishes (I need them) and you are sweet about that lemon cake. I may be posting another cake blog next. 🙂❤️
DeleteWe had friends who wintered for years in Daytona. Most of their neighbors were Canadians. The money poured into Florida from Canada is significant and the magats will live to regret their treatment of our wonderful Northern neighbors.
DeleteIt is a hard time right now. I know that in the face of all these plane crashes, I've found myself thinking that I wouldn't feel sad if AirForce 1 dropped out of the sky. It is a struggle for me to be a good person in bad times. Keep on keeping on, Doug.
ReplyDeleteWell said Debby, I feel just the same way. And I appreciate you (and in turn, Jennifer) inspiring me to post this today, thank you. Hang in there my friend.
DeleteI came to answer your comment on my page and found I had missed this post entirely! Not sure how that happened but I am glad I found it. As you know, I agree. I am over it. I have become mean and bitter and I plan to laugh out loud when bad things happen to bad people. That 's my positive thought. My negative thought is that we are changing our country and our world to a horror movie that we will never escape from. I am terrified.
ReplyDeleteOn a brighter note (could I be more bipolar here?) my son in law is doing so much better. Prior to covid he was a high school teacher and coach, he could no longer ride the bus with the teams or teach in a classroom with overhead lights. He has carved out a good place. He works from home developing college math curriculums, their new house has a basement office that is always cool, and he is more comfortable in cool air. He was an avid walker, walking miles every night. Due to fear of an attack while walking, he now uses a treadmill in said basement and even has it equipped with his laptop so he can work and walk at the same time. The first year he was afraid to drive; he would feel headaches starting and was afraid he would have to pull over, etc. He slowly began driving again and even drives out of town now. Last fall he was a volunteer assistant coach and attended practices and home events. This spring he is making the leap to a hired assistant coach. He plans to be at every practice, every home event and is going to try to ride the bus for out of town events. The entire coaching staff and school has been very supportive. Long Haul Covid is a whole new world. He was stricken early, his doctors are estimating in April or May of 2020 before testing was available. Like most, he had a "flu" like experience and then over the next six months became more and more incapacitated with head aches, etc. There were many dark days, weeks and months. But he has really turned the corner. Probably never back to normal, but happy and healthier and doing more than he ever dreamed of.
I hope the same for you so much, my friend.
Miss Merry, thank you so much for taking the time to share all this (both the fearful stuff and the hopeful). I was encouraged to read how far your son-in-law has gotten, but worried too. Had no idea he had dealt with this so long. This is month 14 for me, I was hoping to be nearing the end, then everything goes backward it seems. Thanks again for sharing his story, gives me something hopeful to look for. 🙂👍
DeleteI am Canadian and my only friend , of over 70 years, is a trumper. She was born in Palestine and I just can’t believe that she likes him. She thinks he is just bluffing and that he will be good for the country. I disagree so we have to just agree to disagree or it will ruin our friendship I met her when she first came to live in Canada at 8 years old. She is very intelligent otherwise. I think our Country is going to go red in the next elections and it worries me. My mother always said that Canada follows what the States does just a few years later. I think we are better than that. Our problem is also to many undocumented immigrants. We don’t have enough housing nor jobs for them. I am glad we are working harder on the border now. We have always welcomed immigrants but it has to be controlled. I think trump knows he is losing it and that is why he has president muskRAT doing his dirty work. He needs someone to blame when things go tits up. I hope your long covid becomes shorter soon. I have never had covid so don’t know what it is like. Gigi
ReplyDeleteGigi thanks so much for sharing here, I really appreciate these Canadian perspectives. I worry for Canada too, then I read the same about France. And I do think it has much to do with the flood of immigrants. But I also think it gives real fascists like Trump a way to reclaim power. I CANNOT believe he's not in prison where he belongs. The American justice system is to blame for that. Thanks again for your comments here and best of luck with your Trump favoring friend.
DeleteLike everyone who has commented here, I feel exactly the same way and share nearly every sentiment. Never before have I actually wished someone dead and I don't like myself for it, but can't help it. Like Debby above, I've had similar thoughts. And I've seen similar comments elsewhere. I read Jennifer's rant on her blog and couldn't agree more! I'm engaging with my senators and congressional representatives and urge everyone to do the same. It's super easy to send an email to their office everyday and it's especially important if you have red representatives. Let them know how you feel. We can also email the WH. Even if some lackey is forced to read them, the message will eventually get through (and the king will probably just shut down the system. Ha!)
ReplyDeleteAlso, for anyone who hasn't read it, Michael Moore offers a glimmer of hope:
https://www.michaelmoore.com/p/overwhelm-overreach-overthrown
Bobi, you know how I feel about you don't you. This was awesome, thank you, geez I just love the honesty. And you are so right about writing our reps--being quiet does nothing. And I can't wait to check out that Michael Moore link, I'll take anything hopeful I can get! :^)
DeleteI am an unapologetic Trump supporter, but I will make no attempt to talk you or anyone else out of the feelings you are having. I know they are shared by many. But an equal number of Americans felt the same way about the previous four years. During that time and (hopefully) the balance of the current administration I've been able to maintain my friendships with those who have different views. I don't debate them because you can't argue anyone out of a deep-seated hatred that seems personal, and not as much attached to a specific issue or policy decision. I believe the fears so many feel right now are unfounded, and time will tell if that's the case. Until then, I will continue to think good thoughts about your health and happiness.
ReplyDeleteThanks for commenting David, I appreciate your honesty. I know it's pointless to debate with a Trump supporter, and vice versa. But regardless of his so-called policies and our differences in opinion, the man is a convicted felon and should be in prison. I blame our messed up justice system for that. I will likewise continue to wish you health & happiness as well.
DeleteAh Doug, the whole world seems to have gone crazy! We have some very good friends that live in Illinois. They LOVE Trump and think everything he is doing is wonderful. I just don’t get it! I find it hard to even speak to them as they continually sing Trumps praises. We have stopped watching any news really as the political situation in Canada has gone nuts too. I am sorry your post Covid symptoms are still lingering. With everything going on this winter has seemed endless. I am a pretty upbeat person but this winter…….
ReplyDeleteTake care Doug.❤️
Robin
Robin, thanks so much for sharing--crazy is right. Your Illinois friends... I shouldn't be surprised, half this country voted for that criminal but I am. I know Canada is going thru surreal things right now too, I hope that's not the result of us people below you. This is all reminding me to hold on to be appreciative of my friends & loved ones, and you are certainly one of them, R. Thanks again for your good words and hang in there.
DeleteIt is just a LOT to unpack and process Daily, the fuckery, as I've come to just call it, is even worse than I thought it could get this quickly and this brutally. I've lived all over the World and seen a lot, even in this Country, in almost 7 Decades around the Sun. Yet, I never thought America would devolve to this level of depravity and divisiveness. We are no longer a UNITED States of America and every great Civilization about every 3 Centuries falls, usually from within. I feel like we're next and I, like Jennifer, feel and say things I never thought, never mind felt or said, but Resistance is just the Right thing to do. To not resist seems like it would be complicit, and I wouldn't want that on my conscience. I know some MAGA that now are repentant that they were Played and that we weren't being hyperbolic at all about the risks and dangers of installing this Regime again. The first time was a dress rehearsal, they never should have been given a 2nd chance, but, here we now are.
ReplyDeleteThank you for sharing your thoughts Bohemian. I must admit your words here have pretty much chilled me to the bone.
DeleteThank you for linking to my blog! I try not to discuss politics too often but it's on my mind all the time. All. The. Time. I look around at the majority of people who seem blissfully oblivious and don't know whether to be furious or envious.
ReplyDeleteJennifer, thank you so much for letting me share! I feel the same when it comes to politics on my blog as well, but your honest words really resonated with me. I enjoyed your recent soup blog too and look forward to more of your posts. 🙂
DeleteIt's not just been a bad day, it's been a bad month. The current insanity is more than I can handle. I live, work, connect with a variety of people of all stripes and colors. I have worked my entire life for people to live a good and decent life, to have the same choices, to be free to live and love as they wish. It appears to all be crumbling right before my eyes. Courage seems to be in short supply. Fascism in high demand and freely distributed. My heart hurts.
ReplyDeleteThis hurt my heart to read, but it was still very well said. Thank you very much for sharing dkzody. I wish I had something hopeful to say, right now I'm at a loss.
DeleteHope your condition improves soon. Not fun. Anyway, I hated it when Trump stated that Zelenskyy is a dictator. It made me so angry that I no longer watch the TV News. That's the only way to have a peaceful, happy life. Avoid the News.
ReplyDeleteThank you Gigi and I'm with you 100%. It's not worth the anguish to watch all this awful news.
Delete